As We Approach Advent and Christmas...

The presents, the food, the weekend parties, the family, the shopping, the late nights, the job, the lack of job, the self-induced expectations, the commercials, Hallmark commercials; it can all be overwhelming at this time of year. Right? Only if we let it be that way. How can we approach Advent and Christmas from a Christian perspective? Think about Jesus and how He approaches us. He gave Himself to us. He only focused on what was important in His life. He always had time for those who needed Him. He was very close with His heavenly Father, always wanting to follow God's will.
Seriously, how can you put that recipe into your Christmas preparations? Have a plan as a family. Sit down with your budget, your calendar and your priorities as a family who loves God and map out a plan. Gift-giving does not have to always be about money. My husband and I love having time with our children and grandchildren. That is a gift to us. Giving a letter to my children and grandchildren about how special they are to me is something they treasure. Think about ways that you as a family can give of yourselves to one another and to those who are lonely or not as blessed as you. When you are shopping for others, have a plan and a budget and stick to it. There will be no remorse on your part later. Always give with no expectations of getting. Give from your heart out of the joy of giving.
Have a plan on how you will spend your time on the weekends. Children and adults both need down time on the weekends to be able to re-charge for the week. Try to eat healthy food and stick to the family bedtime routines.
Most importantly, Jesus IS the reason for the season. Without worship we can completely lose sight of why we have Christmas. Jesus came. He lived. He died. He rose for you and me so that we can have eternal life. Now, we are waiting with a giving heart for Him to return.

Young Children and Play

So often I am struck by the amount of planned activities scheduled into young children’s lives. I know there will be some who think I’m being behind the times when I say that too many children are over-scheduled, sleep deprived and kept from being able to have time in their day when they are allowed to involve themselves in imaginative or pretend play. Many young children spend anywhere from 6 – 10 hours a day away from home in a school or day care setting. This is usually followed by a quick dinner and then off to some sort of lesson or sport to be followed up by a bath, book and bedtime. Then the next day begins the cycle again. The weekends are filled with exuberant birthday parties, games to be played by various teams, errands to be run in between it all and then if no one is too tired or there isn’t a game scheduled time at church.

Children use play as a tool. It is how they make sense of the world that they are just beginning to explore independently. Listen carefully to your child’s play. It will tell you a great deal about what they know. We listen carefully at school. It tells us what they understand about what has been taught to them. As parents we can hear how we sound to our children through their play and what we model for them as parents. Children develop more in-depth language skills through their play as they use conversation and vocabulary that pertains to their play. When children are involved in pretend play with other children they work develop problem-solving skills and learn how to work cooperatively with others on their own terms.

Do you know that most creative people have a place, space or time where they remove themselves from the “rat race” to be able to hear the creativity in their head? Marc Brown (author of “Arthur”) has a day dreaming place. Children need adults to support them in their play by offering them time, places, supplies and materials to facilitate their play. Children’s play takes time, not just a few minutes. They need hours to play. The materials don’t need to be anything elaborate. I’m sure you’ve seen the joy that a big box brings to a child. It is through their play that they can become more creative, self-assured, better social and problem-solving skills and stronger language skills.

Give yourselves and your children permission to ditch the rat race of 16 hour days for some quality time to just watch, facilitate and enjoy playing.

Positive Separation

As children begin to venture out beyond their home and family, they need to know some basic things to help them separate confidently. Your child needs to hear the reassurance that you love him/her, you will be back in a little whle and that your child will have fun. Sometimes for a variety of reasons children still have some difficulty leaving the loving armos of mom or dad. Understand, most children stop crying before you have left in your car.If a child is continuously upset without being able to be consoled we will call right away. Here are some things that will help your child transition to leaving you positively so that you can feel good inside and be assured that they are fine.

• Look positively and confidently at your child when you are preparing to leave. Tell yoru child that s/he will have fun! If you look anxious, your child will read your face, instead of listening to your words.
• Give your child somethign that belongs to you to take care of while you are both apart. This could be a picture, piece of jewelry, a pen, etc. Somethign easy for them to take care of throughout their time away from you. Your child knows that you will come back if s/he has something that belongs to you.
• Talk about school frequently at home in a positive manner.
• Talk to your child about how grown up they are. We mean a grown up three or four year old; not adult.