Family Traditions

I'm finding out the importance of family traditions now that my children are grown. The stories my children tell are of the traditions we had as they were growing up in our family. The value of the traditions continue when those traditions are carried out in their own families or blended with the traditions of each one's spouse's family. My daughter and her husband had a lengthly discussion as to what should be on top of the Christmas tree - an angel or a star. Each family was different. I had to laugh.
I came from a family where there wasn't a great deal of emphasis on those traditions. When my husband and I got married I let him know that it was important to me that we establish some traditions in our family. He came from a family steeped in tradition. As our family grew there was always room for flexibility in our traditions to match the needs and stage of life of our family. Some of those traditions are still intact today.
Children find security in traditions. It is something they can look forward to as they anticipate an event or holiday in life. We are able to enrich the lives of those in our family with the stories that become part of our family heritage by establishing traditions. A tradition doesn't have to be something that involves a great deal of expense. It can be a very simple thing, but one that is always there. Every family has their own and they are just right for that family. The following are just a few of our family traditions.

• Every year for the first day of school our children received a letter from us filled with hope and promises about the new school year along with the message that Jesus loved them more than we did.
• We have several Nativities throughout the house at Christmas. Jesus cannot be in the creche until Christmas. Our son delighted in trying to hide Jesus so that when Christmas came we would be in a panic looking for Him.
• Each family member was allowed to choose the menu for dinner on his/her birthday.
• If a family member cooks dinner, that family member does not have to clean up afterwards.
• On the last day of school we would take a trip to the bookstore by Grandma and Grandpa's house to buy books to read over the summer. This worked until the books were getting read before we got home from our little trip. We then became avid library patrons.
• There was never a schedule on a vacation.
• Every New Years Eve we would go to a hotel and spend the night with dear friends. The next morning, most years, we would go hiking at Starved Rock. It was great!
• We generally solved family issues by having a family meeting.
• Our best tradition is our faith. We love our Lord as a family. It is not just a tradition for us, but a way of life. I give thanks to God that we've been able to hand down our love for the Lord to both our children and grandchildren. Our parting words to our grandchildren are always, Love you. Jesus loves you even more!

These are just some of our family traditions. I would love to hear about yours and those you've taken from your growing up years and adopted for your own family.

Are You Hiding in the Bathroom?

I still remember a time when I just went into our bathroom and shut the door for two minutes of peace and quiet. Our children were young and my husband and I worked opposite schedules which was great savings in childcare, but challenging to our marriage and raising two children. I also remember wondering if I would ever be able to do something alone without little hands trying to do it with me. Many of you may be in a similar situation especially with these economic times challenging family budgets. There is no doubt about it, parenting is one of the most difficult jobs a person could ever do. A parent is on call 24/7 whether at work or at home. Parent s of young children will likely never be as tired as they are during this time. I might argue that parenting teens can be as exhausting if, like me, you can't go to sleep until they are home and in bed. It is a very physically, mentally and emotionally demanding time. Right now someone is wondering when I'm going to get to the good news. Here it is. All of the above is true and although I am a grandmother I haven't forgotten the demands and exhaustion of that stage of life. It is also a very fulfilling time which may be why I've always enjoyed working with young children.
Young children have an amazing sense of wonder about EVERYTHING. They overflow with unconditional love, (except for their siblings), and dabbling in the world of make believe can just be magical. You are the most important person in the world to them in every sort of way. That won't happen again until their late twenties or early thirties. When young children tell me about the love they have for Jesus my heart just melts! There is no greater joy than hearing children share their faith with amazing exuberance! Christian parents live to hear it.
Do you still want two minutes in the bathroom for peace and quiet? Sure you do. Take it. Do something kind for yourself. Take time to talk to God and accept His peace and love for you. Then enjoy this magical time. It goes by much quicker than you think.

Did you know...?

In Case You Didn’t Know…
Christmas is coming! More importantly, it is the season of Advent in the church. That is the season when we celebrate Christ’s first coming as an infant and anticipate His second coming. There is such a flurry of activities getting ready for Christmas. Much of it is fun and contributes to family traditions. Many people put a great deal of thought and preparation into getting ready for Christmas months before it arrives.
What if we put that same thought and preparation in getting ready for Christ’s second coming? What do I mean? We don’t know when Christ is returning. There are those who think they know, but the Bible tells us to keep watch as we don’t know the day or the hour that Christ will return. How do we keep watch? We remain steadfast in the Lord. We pray without ceasing. We remain in His Word and in fellowship with other believers. Now, is this easy? I can tell you firsthand that it is far from easy, especially when Satan is constantly on the prowl and disguises himself so well. Seriously, though, what if we put the same kind of effort into this that we put into decorating our homes for Christmas, finding the right gifts for everyone on our list, making our budget work to do so, and meeting the demands of the season? Imagine what our world would be like. I think it would be a kinder and gentler place centered on Christ. May you all have a blessed Advent season as we wait for our Savior to return to us.
Dawn Knosher

Life with Young Children

As adults, we all know the value of delayed gratification. We were taught as a child to save our money, stay in school, homework first, then go outside, and wait until marriage to be intimate with the one you love. When do we learn that? How do we learn that? How can families teach that today as they raise children in an instant world? It is hard work, but you might be able to gain some insight as you view this video on the "Marshmallow Test" and then read about the longitudinal study that was done that helps us understand the implications of a simple thing like getting a young child to wait for a reward.

There is much we can do as the adults in our children's world to facilitate a better understanding and motivation for delayed gratification. Using our faith, we can pray that God give us the strength, peace and patience to wait. We can grow in our understanding of living inside God's plan for each of us and that not waiting may be outside of His plan for our lives. We can also see that God only wants what is best for us and that not delaying gratification will likely bring us harm in some way. Watch this video and read the report by following these links. (The article): http://www.dailymail.co.uk/sciencetech/article-1082430/Marshmallow-test--resisting-sweet-lead-better-life.html The video: http://www.tangle.com/view_video.php?viewkey=fe8dac8ea404308c4068

Think and pray about ways that you can teach and model delayed gratification for your family.

Blessings,

Dawn Knosher

Who is in control, really?

I read a line once that said, "If you want to make God laugh tell Him your plans." It is true! I notice as a get ready for the day either at work or at home I have a running "Do List" in my head. If I get as far as work with being able to maintain that list I'm doing remarkably well. Most times, my list is a "sidebar" from what God has planned for me. Children and the adults in their lives often struggle with "control" issues especially in new situations. At times, new teachers, care givers and even parents can get so entangled as to who is going to have control over a situation that they lose the main focus of the event completely.
It's been my experience to offer as much control as is appropriate, but in manageable chunks. For instance, asking a child, "What do you want for lunch today?" can be overwhelming. Asking a child to pick a lunch item from two choices is much more appropriate. This gives the child the opportunity to have some control and so does the chef! Sometimes the choices may not seem like real choices. For instance, a child can either eat his/her dinner or wait to eat at breakfast. My son once told me that I wasn't giving him two good choices with that plan. I let him know that those were still his choices and there would be no consequences for not choosing to eat. He assured me that the consequence would be that he would be hungry. I told him that he had that choice. He ate his dinner.
God offers us choices every minute of every day. We have free will to either follow God's plan for us or to live outside of His plan, if only for a moment. Since we are all sinners, we often don't make the best choice, but with the help of the Holy Spirit we also can make the right choice at the moment. When we make the wrong choices we live and deal with the natural consequences that come our way. Teaching your child about how to make decisions, living with the choices they make, and understanding the choices they have all help your child to grow in Christian living when it is taught centered on his/her relationship with God. May God be with you as you nurture and guide your family.

So, It's Summer and the Kids Are Home...

The first week or so after school is out can be ominous for a family depending on your situation. Why? The family has gone from a very structured lifestyle to ,"What do we do now?" As much as we like to let go of routines, young children especially find routines very important as a source of security that all is right with the world. So, how do you enjoy summer and fill the need for a family routine? Have a flexible summer routine! What would that look like? That depends on the needs of your family. It is still very appropriate and enhances family happiness to have a regular bedtime and a time when everyone needs to be up, fed and dressed. A few basic things can help with the rest of that. For instance, a plan that includes when "screen time" is available to them or a day of the week that is set for playdates. Every adult member of a family lives for "FOB" time, or flat on your back time that lasts about an hour. This usually takes place after lunch, but before dinner as a time when children enjoy books, puzzles, quiet drawing or even sleep and the adult in the home gets a break!
Does our current economic situation have you staying at home this summer? Check out your local community websites for lots of free fun available to you. If you live in the Chicago area most museums have a free day AND Navy Pier has free fireworks every Wednesday and Saturday night! Be sure to check out your local library for their fun summer reading program as well. Many restaurants have a day of the week where kids eat free with paying adults! Sit down as a family and map out a plan for your time together.
Summer is a wonderful time to enjoy the beauty of the creation God has given to us. It's also a time when families often create life-lasting memories together. How can you put those two things together? Your family has been given the gift of time to strengthen your family bond and keep it centered on Christ. I pray that all who read this have a safe, God-filled, awesome summer.

How Does Your Garden Grow?

Is there a spot in your yard that could use a little something? Maybe not, but maybe there's a big flower pot lying around empty waiting to be put to use. Gardening is a great project to do with young children. Go to the store and pick out seeds and bulbs with your child(ren). Grow a vegetable garden or flower garden, maybe even both. Children love to grow things. Seeds that germinate quickly and are good in a cooler spring climate are a good choice. Have your child think of things that they like to have in a salad and grow them. This can be easily started inside and then brought outdoors as either a container garden or part of our landscaping.
Children learn great lessons in this project. They learn to take responsibility in caring for something else besides themselves. They begin to understand the life cycle of plants. Generally, they grow in their appreciation for the food they have grown. Often times, children will take more risks in eating what they have grown than picking it up at the grocery store.
Take time on a rainy Saturday to start your garden project. Pick out foods from a magazine that look good and then match the pictures on the seed packets. Pick up a starter pack and enjoy! You could even have your child keep a journal about their garden. They could name their plants or label them. At harvest time celebrate by preparing the food together! We would love for you to post pictures or stories about your garden.